www.womanthismonth.com June 2021 49 parenting YOUR LENS When you look at your child, who do you see? Do you see the positives or the negatives? The way you think about them influences the way you treat them. Your thoughts also influence the way you feel emotionally and physically throughout the day. "He is in the terrible twos" will cause you to look for terrible things, to focus on them, and therefore try to correct them… constantly. Try to turn negative thoughts like this into positive thoughts, like, "He is inquisitive and fun!". Try to start seeing misbehaviour as a clue that calls for help rather than something that needs to be squashed immediately. Correction is not needed nearly as often as you might think. Monitor how you talk about them when they are present, watch your tone, your words, and how you verbalise the way you see your children. YOUR CUP How full is it? You have to take care of you so you can take care of them. If your cup is full, you are more patient, more empathetic, and have more energy. Not only that, but a child who sees his parents respect themselves learns to have selfrespect. Put yourself back on your list. MEDIA. TELEVISION. VIDEO GAMES. SOCIAL MEDIA. They are always sending messages to your kids, I am not saying don’t allow them, just be aware of what your kids are getting from what they're watching. BASIC NEEDS Adequate nutrition, sleep, and exercise are not only essential for the well-being of your child but also influence behaviour. They might not be able to recognise or verbalise their needs, but it will still mess with their behaviour and how cooperative they are during the day. Finally, exercise helps children learn to focus their attention, limit anger outburst and improve motor skills. YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR SIGNIFICANT OTHER Your kids are watching and learning. The way you and your partner treat each other again sets a standard. Happy parents make happy kids. THE ATMOSPHERE OF YOUR HOME All of the things mentioned above come together to create the atmosphere in your home. If you have loving and connected relationships, you likely have a warm atmosphere in your home. If there is discord between you and your spouse, or you and your child, or your child and your other child, then the overall atmosphere will suffer. Have you ever gone to someone's home and just felt a negative atmosphere? You want your home to be a safe, warm, inviting, and loving place for all family members.
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