LIFESTYLE | opinion May 2023 www.womanthismonth.com 90 MAKING MISTAKES IS FINE. We put padding on the sharp corners of the coffee table. We put dangerous chemicals in locked cabinets and make children hold our hand in car parks. In the first few years of their life, we see them as incapable of 'good' judgment and keeping themselves safe. They need constant supervision by a responsible adult. But in just a few short years, our babies become toddlers, our toddlers become school-age children and our school-age children become teenagers. As they get older, they need us less and less for their physical safety—but our parental protective instincts are still there. Consequently, for many of us, our focus shifts to protecting them from disappointment, sadness, frustration and struggle—their emotional safety. But, this is where I am going to invite you to consider another perspective. Could a little disappointment, sadness, frustration and struggle be a good thing? Think of it this way: it is kind of like physical exercise. The benefits are only gained as you work through the pain and discomfort. So, what are the benefits of your teenager making a mistake and then working through the emotional pain to find a solution? Resiliency and resourcefulness. Now I know what you are probably thinking: "That sounds awesome, but I can’t just leave them hanging." The key is to make the shift from your instinctive desire to protect or rescue your teenager, to the long term goal of their personal development. As parents, we are instinctively inclined to protect our children. We wouldn’t want them to experience negative emotions or make mistakes, right? Ouiam El Hassani tells us otherwise and shares her tips on how to let our teenagers make mistakes, with emotional growth in mind.
RkJQdWJsaXNoZXIy Mjk0MTkxMQ==